Well, if there's anything I'm good at, it's getting into trouble. I know, I know, what have I done this time? Well, when backing out of a friend's driveway today, I scraped their neighbour's car that was parked along the curb. I mean, it's a pretty common mistake I guess...people accidentally rear end and dent and scrape other cars all the time. Despite that, I still didn't (and don't) feel any better. Our car is a dark gray, and the car I scraped was white, thus making the scratch very obvious. Our car got damaged more than the other car, which in a way I am thankful for. I left a note on the windshield with my phone number, and now I'm just waiting for a call. Leo was not impressed, to say the least. He threatened me with a spanking, but I was just in this strange mood where being spanked sounded like the last thing I needed or wanted. I was already feeling guilty and upset for my mistake, which was a complete accident, but was also avoidable if I had been more careful. I ignored him for awhile after his threat, which also left me feeling guilty.
We had a similar scenario last week. I was given the pending spanking that I had posted about in my last post, but I just couldn't take it. I don't have a high pain tolerance anyway, but for some reason it was just unbearable, even though he was only using his hand. I didn't even want to try to accept my punishment. Leo knew this, and he stopped the spanking. Just like that. Part of me was relieved that he stopped, but part of me was frustrated that he just gave up. And, other than the threat earlier tonight, we haven't even really spoken about spanking since. I know that I am sending mixed messages when I express a need to be spanked and then become hostile and frustrated when he tries to spank me. I am always remarking on how this lifestyle isn't easy. I guess times like this are just proof.
If there's anything I could use a good spanking for, it would be to start posting more! It's been over a week since my last post - shameful, really. After my 'incident' earlier, my friend and I went to the movies and saw Harry Potter. I'm not a diehard Harry Potter fan; I read the books and thought it was a good story, but you'll definitely never catch me at opening night wearing a wizard cape. I must admit, though, the movie really was excellent! If you're considering seeing it, I recommend that you do.
Other than that, I don't think that there's much else for me to report! What's going on with all of you other spankos? :)
Im just on my way out so just a quick thought have you considered other punishments apart from spanking - time out, early bedtime, just a plain telling off, corner time, extra chores, removing privilleges, writing lines? He confiscates my cash cards all the time - or Im not allowed to go shopping by myself. And the thought of being sent to bed early and missing my favourite show :( horrible.
ReplyDeleteAs for me, well im always in trouble, i think trouble is my middle name right now LOL. I got a major spanking on Sunday night for a few things that had accumulated. Not sure it works because i was also so very angry and frustrated with him because he hadnt spanked me sooner...long story ... I have blogged about it. Will see what happens.
But glad to see you back, have missed you, blog more often LOL - I like hearing from you :)
IslaWinter,
ReplyDeleteI used to constantly fuss that Nick wasn't spanking hard enough or long enough. But then after an especially long break it seemed like I just couldn't take it. I became a real wimp. I still wanted him to spank but it really hurt. Mixed signals must drive the guys crazy. Maybe you could ask him to start off slower, maybe over clothes and continue with a long warmup to give you a chance to adjust.
Hugs,
PK
Aw, I think these bumps in the road ( and in our moods) are completely normal. Maybe one thing to do, if you haven't already, is to sit down and just get it all out. Maybe writing down what issues to focus on would help. For example, having an accident isn't a spankable offence (because in the end, it isn't a relationship threatening issue) but perhaps you would like him to always follow through on something else you struggle with. I wouldn't want a spanking for having an accident either. I would be so shaken up and those are times when your partner needs to be there to hold you close and comfort. For us, we have a few key issues that guarantee a spanking. It helps me to know what to expect and it helps my husband to be clear on what he will spank for so that when I try to stall ( as we all do!), he can just point out the behaviour in our agreement and then follow through with the consequence. I certainly don't want to tell you how to do DD - it is different for everyone - but I just thought I'd share what I have found helpful.
ReplyDeleteOn another note: Harry Potter rocked!! I'm a huge fan of the books and I've seen most of the movies. I loved it! :)
Not all mishaps deserve spanking, right? Maybe you need a slower, longer, less intense, non-punishment spanking to help you feel more settled and less moody? Just a thought, as even when I don't want it, I know it almost always helps me. Sara
ReplyDeleteKiwi - Up until now, Leo and I have really only used spanking as a punishment. But I think that your suggestion would be really beneficial! (Although missing any of my favourite shows would be terrible, so I think I'll accidentally-on-purpose forget to share that one with him, haha). Corner time and writing lines have always been something that I have thought about but never discussed with Leo. Thanks for the thought - I will have to mention them to him! And I will try to blog more often, I promise!
ReplyDeletePK - Leo has always gone straight to the bare, which I think is part of the problem. It would probably be easier to take the spankings if he started off with a warm up over the pants. Thank you for the suggestion! :)
TDDUP - I agree. While it wasn't quite a full blown accident (thank goodness), I still felt shaken and upset by it. I think that if Leo and I had specific instances where I would automatically be spanked, we wouldn't have to constantly contemplate what is and isn't a spankable offence. We have done this before; I used to post about having a bedtime, and I would be spanked if I didn't manage to make it on time. It would probably be a good idea to sit down and really communicate about it, as you suggested.
findingsara - I think that regular maintenance spankings could be helpful. I know in the back of my mind that even though I don't want a spanking, it will still help me...but sometimes I just forget. I have a lot to discuss with Leo! :)
LOL, I can't seem to stay out of trouble, either! I know what you mean by the pain seeming overwhelming. And sending mixed messages. Definitely discuss warm-ups. My guy wouldn't let us do that, but he did agree to go softer in the beginning. So that's worked better, as has having gotten in trouble a lot, so I've gotten more used to it, LOL (not intentional, but still a great byproduct)! Good luck to you, girl! :)
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